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Blame it on the alcohol

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[03 Jul 2006|01:51am]

so i had a bottle of boone's farm [strawberry daquari], a few beers, and a game of beer pong, which my partner and i lost. i met a tattoo artist. the first time we met at a different party, he looked at my tattoo on my arm as he was shaking my hand and i said "are you looking at my boobs?" and he was like "no, i'm a tattoo artist, i was looking at your tattoo."

so then, i meet him again tonight and reminded him of when we first met, because he didn't remember me, and he said "yeah, i was probably looking at your boobs."
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I'm new I need friends!!!! [01 Jun 2006|11:44am]

Friend me. I'm new! and wasted 99% of the time

I got mad style!

claudiaCollapse )
8 comments|post comment

[06 Dec 2005|01:35pm]

I did something stupid while stupid-drunk. I don't blame it all on the alcohol. Yeah, I knew what I was doing. But for the entire time, it's like.... nothing of consequence entered my head. Like, nothing bad was going to happen, no repercussions...tomorrow, I'll wake up, feeling fine (always do, no matter how drunk), and I'll go back to my life.

I made out and messed around with a good friend of mine. Thing is, I've been in a relationship for 2+ years. And I love my girlfriend. Well, most people would say that's debatable now. But I know how I feel. I know it was wrong. I know that I deserve everything I get, and deserve everything I lose because of this. I've got a few more issues, but in all honesty, I really don't think that I would've been catapulted to go as far as I did (or anywhere at all) had it not been for the disgusting amount of alcohol. It wasn't a LOT, but it was fast. And I don't drink much, so I'm cheap.

That's pretty much it...
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[07 Mar 2005|10:07am]

My friday night...
title or description
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Humor me [18 Feb 2005|12:33pm]

Ok time for a brutally_wasted question and answer section.

What is the thing you regret doing most while brutally wasted???

Mine is easy. Girl on girl action with my best friend. :(

Talk about an awkward morning after......
11 comments|post comment

wasted. [02 Feb 2005|02:33am]


one of my most wasted moments. ahhh. so fun.Collapse )

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ive got a lot friends in really low places [29 Jan 2005|02:44am]
my friends were all like, what do you want for your birthday? and i was like "just get me booze" and they laughed and i was like, "no... im serious. booze. and a stripper too."

the stripper wouldnt let me take her picture.
4 comments|post comment

Drunk game (literally) [19 Jan 2005|06:20pm]

Check out this game!

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[18 Jan 2005|11:42pm]


Hey, I'm Jamie and new to the community :)  I found it through bular .  I figured I post enough stories in my journal about drunkeness, this would be even better :D

Well here is one of many I'll be sharing :)

This one happened just last weekend.  (We party pretty much every weekend) Anyways, we are playing a bunch of drinking games, having a blast and everyone by this point is slammed.  Well we are just talking about stupid drunk crap, and somehow it's decided that my two female, lesbian friends are going to go outside and smoke topless.  Well hell, ok, haha.  Then my horny, drunk friend Jim decides to throw in a 20 if they smoke outside naked. It's starting to get interesting.  And just to let ya'll know, I do live in Wisconsin and it is COLD AS HELL.  Like we are talking below 0 at the moment. ;)  Well we get outside, and I'm laughing my ass off watching these two naked girls try to smoke.  And mind you, we are not in the country, they live in an apartment in a fairly big city, lol.  Well of course, something more has to happen.  The girls then attempt to ask my boyfriend Chris to get naked with them for 5 bucks, haha.  So by this time, I'm in the snow rolling around to see 2 of my best friends and my boyfriend standing out in the Wisconsin cold, butt assed naked.  It was great.

And that is my drunken story for the moment, can't wait to share more :D

7 comments|post comment

New.. but got a funny story [17 Jan 2005|07:06pm]
[ mood | amused ]

Hi I'm new to this community but i have quite a funny story..  I always tell this drunk story because its always so funny..  It was not actually me who made an ass of myself..  But It was there for it and caused some of it..

My friend, her friend Kasey, and i were getting ioff work (we worked in  Sports restuarant and accross from an Irish Pub)   we sat down and drinking with the guy I was dating, two of his friends, and julee's  brother..    so they were like we're going to chris's house to go smake and chill come by later if you guys want..  We were liek whatever.. we actuall wanted to fuind better things to do but figured we'd come by.. So first we decided to go drive to our favorite Pizza place which was on the way to his house..  So we had Julees's car but Kasey was driving because Julee was wasted..  LOL...  So anyway on the way their me and Juleee really ahve to Pee..  but there  is no where to stop and Julee rwally had to go (she's a really mean drunk i have many stories including her)  So we pulled into the back of something in was like  a restuarant dock... or something.. so me and Julee are squatting on the side of the dumpster peeing.. when this manly lookly security lady comes out we can't hide because our car is obivously there with kasey in it.. so we run back to the car.. I get in the passanger side..a nd I hear the back door open and close.. Kasey starts pulling back slowly.. when she hits something.. we get out the car to check what it is... Julleee pops up from no where .. we swore she was laying int he back seat..  She she jumpand the car and yells pull off. so we do.. we're in the Car and she's like"you bitches ran me over"  we're like why were you under the car?   she's like I wasn't  I dropped soemthign and went to pick it up....  we're like why did you open the car door and  close it.. all she says is you bitches hit me my ass hurts.. She's in the Car pulling down her pants showing us her ass.. eventually she shuts up about it.. so we think it passed..      So we go get pizza.. Go to the guys house .. They're watching some movie.. high and blank loooking one of them is passed out.. So we come  in me and Kasey sit quietly...  al of sudden Julles starts in These Bitches ran me over with my own car.. Look at my asss.  She continues to pull her pants down and show her ass to all of them.. being that she's drunk she wasn't stable enough to just pull the back down.. so they saw all her..goodies needless to say.. her brother was traumatizes.. .
 the next day she didn't remembr all she knew is we hit her and her ass hurt .. lOL

5 comments|post comment

Newbie here [16 Jan 2005|04:34am]

Hi all, i'm 20 from Canada(21 next month yay).
Anyways a quick yet short drunk story for you guys.
2 summer's ago my friend Mike held a 'End of Summer, Hello School' party.
It was fun, i had i think 9 drinks @ that time, at which point i was dared to do something crazy for $50.
What'd i do? i did a backflip off the porch rail into a big kiddie pool full of jello, i landed with only my legs sticking out, my friend had a blast getting me out heh.
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[13 Jan 2005|04:25pm]

[ mood | crazy ]

Ok here's another one.

I'm a waitress at an Irish Pub on the weekends. It's my second job and I LOVE it.

Two of our regulars, Tom and Whitney, are in their early 30's and they recently bought a house.

Well Tom decided that he wanted to build a bar in the basement. It took him about a month, but it was finally finished. He invited a whole buttload of us from the bar over to his house to tap the first Guiness keg.

The party was a blast. About 15 of us ended up in the hottub, including our General Manager, Mac(who's gay), me, my boyfriend, Tom(the owner of the house), and a few others.

SOMEHOW, a bottle of Irish Mist is in the hottub being passed around. I have about 3-4 gulps of it. Not smart. Tom then tells me that there's a pool on who gets naked first. It's up to $200 and it's going to be donated to the firehouse(Tom's a fireman).

WELL. ANYTHING FOR THE FIREHOUSE!!(of course, I found out later that there was no pool. Yeah. Awesome.) I whip off my bathing suit and throw it off the balcony, where it lands on someone's head standing down below. Whoops. Later, my bathing suit, along with my jeans, bra, and mesh shorts would get shot out of the potato gun that Tom had built earlier that day.

My bathing suit bottoms are still in the tree, 2 months later.

Anyway, that's not the embarrassing part. After everyone is basically naked, a bottle of Grand Marnier somehow comes into the hottub. Don't remember this - but I heard a drank a good amount of it. A bottle of Dom Perignon is later added to the mix.

All of a sudden, I have to pee. Keep in mind, there are 15 people in the hot tub, and about 15 people at the table on the deck NEXT to the hottub. All close friends/coworkers/regulars at the bar I'm at every weekend.

I scoot up onto the edge of the hottub. Still naked. I'm facing everyone in the hottub. As I scoot up, I guess I forgot to swing a leg over to get OUT of the hottub, because I fell over backwards. Fell about 2 feet down onto the wood deck. Naked. SPLAYED for everyone to see.

My boyfriend quickly jumped out and covered me with a towel, while LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF.

I think I might have cried for a while. I don't know. What I DO know is that I had about 4 bruises the next day on my ass and thighs.

Thank you, Mist and GM. I salute you.


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My mom has great drunk stories too.... [13 Jan 2005|10:25am]

My ex boyfriend James and I had just started going out at the time and Christmas was coming near. He had mentioned to me several times that he would like to come over to my house for Christmas Eve since he had not gotten the chance to spend any time with my family yet. I was a little nervous about this because my family has a Christmas party every year and my relatives tend to get quite wasted. I was afraid of what could happen, but he assured me that there was nothing my family could do that would embarrass him..

Little did he know....

My mom never drinks, but for some reason she had decided she wanted to partake in the drunken Christmas bash. After downing almost a whole bottle of wine by herself and nearly half a bottle of Jagermeister by herself, my mom was way past lit. James met my mom for the first time as she was grabbing the phone from my sister to talk to my sister's boyfriend.

"Grady Paul...you're such a good looking boy. You really are. If I were your age I would have such a crush on you." She slurred into the phone. Tiffany was cracking up at her and held out a cassette recorder so that she could have the evidence of our mom's drunken confession on tape. James just kind of looked at me like...woah your mom is drunk. I wanted to hide.

But no..it got worse.

Mom decided to let everyone know how much she loved them and how my dad hated her (just the alcohol talking) when she went downstairs. She kept crying and saying "Your dad hates me. He always has." She told me she loved the way the house was decorated and that she loved our Christmas tree. She decided she loves the Xmas tree so much that she gives it a hug. The hug continues longer until she is practically climbing up the tree. Before we realized it, the tree came tumbling down into the floor. My dad rushed over to help, and suggested to my mom that maybe she should lie down. This pissed my mom off even more.

She had disappeared for a little while and we assumed she went to bed, but then we heard firecrackers going off outside. My mom was standing outside in the snow, barefoot, letting off fireworks. We all rushed out to see what the hell was going on, and we got out there just in time to see my mom burn her hand up pretty badly while trying to light the fireworks. She started crying and my dad went out to see if everything was ok, but this just upset her more. She took off running down the street.

"Let her go." My dad said. "She'll be back eventually."
"But it's cold and she is barefoot." I said to him.
"That just means she will be back even sooner than you'd think."

But after an hour had passed and she still wasn't back, my dad grabbed his flashlight and went in search of my mom. Where did he find her?

Oh man...I'm sort of embarrassed even saying this...

He found her hiding underneath a trailer almost a mile from where we lived. She told him she planned on staying there forever.

She had also sprained her ankle so he had to carry her home.

So yeah....Merry White Trash Christmas.

Needless to say, it wasn't the best first impression my parents ever made on a boyfriend.
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Hello! [12 Jan 2005|05:23pm]

[ mood | bored ]

Just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Noel. I am a drinker. Most of my weekends are spent drunk in clubs at partys and shows, etc. I think I might be slipping cause I haven't had a drink since the 1st! ACK!!!

I have many amusing stories. And you can be sure that I will post while drunk. :) (yes, I am also one of those people that call all my friends when drunk too!)

Well, one thing I am good at is getting my pic taken while I am drunk. So here is just one of my many drunk pics. This is from New Years Eve in LA. I was at a concert of one of my favorite bands, with backstage and VIP passes. Free chanpagne and greygoose/redbulls...aww yeah! Can't get much better then that!

Click for pic

3 comments|post comment

[12 Jan 2005|04:00pm]

[ mood | embarrassed ]

Ok here's a fun drunk story.

Sooooo a little bit of background: I went to the University of Maryland and graduated last year. My sister, who is 5 years older than me, is CRAZY. Like, seriously. Depressive. On lots of drugs NOW. She wasn't on drugs 3 years ago.

Ok so. My sister came down to Maryland to visit me at college 3 years ago. I wasn't yet 21, but we look so alike that we just passed back her ID when we went to the bar. For some reason she drove down with her ex-boyfriend, who I was also friends with.

So we went to Cornerstone, a really popular bar in College Park. We met up with a few of my friends there and proceeded to get wasted.

As Mandy(my sis) tends to do when drunk, she starts to get surly, calls me a stupid whore, and runs out the bar, yelling about how she's going to kill herself.


*btw - I'm not exaggerating any of this. She's nuts.*

Her ex and I run out of the bar after her. She's running up the road and comes to an apartment complex. This apartment complex has a staircase running from its parking lot down to another parking lot of the lower set of apartments.

She tells us she's going to 'fly down the stairs and kill herself'. HAMMERED, I tell you.

So Mandy starts bookin' it down these stairs. Freaked, I run after her. She hits the bottom, trips on the pavement, and falls. I do the exact same thing, except I'm not smart and I didn't put my arms out to catch me as I fell.

I wake up spitting out blood and teeth, with my sister crying next to me and my friends ready to take me to the emergency room. 3 stitches on the inside of my lip, and 2 broken FRONT TEETH.

Needless to say, I wouldn't see my sister again until she got on a heavy dose of Paxil.

Epilogue - 3 weeks later, I'm in bed with my boyfriend Dylan and I start poking at my bottom lip - when a piece of tooth fell out, I realized that in fact, it wasn't scar tissue in my lip, it was THE PIECE OF TOOTH THAT THE MORONS AT THE EMERGENCY ROOM SEWED INTO MY LIP.


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[12 Jan 2005|10:39am]

[ mood | amused ]

Taking drunk pictures while holding drinks? WHO DOES THAT??

Read more...Collapse )

YAYYYYY DRUNK PICTURES!! bular, you're next.

2 comments|post comment

When they say not to mix them... [12 Jan 2005|08:59am]

[ mood | amused ]

This isn't terribly shocking, but it was pretty funny.

A couple years ago, I took some cold medication. An hour or so later, having completely forgotten that I did this, I cheerfully consumed a margarita the size of my head.

For the first little while, everything was still good. But then something strange happened.

We were playing a card game called Dutch Blitz, where the idea is to play all your cards very fast onto various piles in the middle of the table. There are no turns - everyone just plays all at once.

As I kept playing, though, I started to get this strange feeling like my arms were getting longer and longer. My hands felt ridiculously far away. I started moving slower, cause it seemed impossible that any messages would be able to get down my arms, which at this point felt like they were about 6 feet long.

Eventually, the whole game stopped, because I was just sitting there with a stupid grin on my face, staring at my hands. Any attempts to explain what was so fascinating about them just dissolved into giggles.

The moral of this story has since become my Drinking Rule #3: When they say not to mix the medication with alcohol, they are not kidding.

5 comments|post comment

Intro/Mod Post [12 Jan 2005|02:25am]

First of all, I just wanted to welcome everyone that has already joined the community and there are just a few things I wanted to say:

1. I'm not very good at this community stuff yet, but I'm giving it a shot. I hope it doesn't turn out to be a complete failure because I think it could be really fun. If anyone has any suggestions they wanna offer I can be reached at kygal214 on AIM.

2. Everyone knows I'm an idiot when it comes to computer stuff. I am just now starting to get HTML down. If someone thinks they may be able to spruce up the layout with some nifty images, I'd be totally down. I don't know how much you can do with a free account, but I dont really think this community needs a paid one and I'm not gonna fork out the $$.

3. PLEASE tell your friends! Make them join! Threaten their lives! Threaten the lives of their unborn children! Do something!

4. Ever notice how most of your pictures include yourself posing with drinks? Now you have some place to showcase them! Post drunken pictures also! That would be soooo funny.

And on with the show...

This community is perfect for me because I have so many stories I could share, but I couldn't decide which one I wanted to open with. The funny thing is, something just came to me tonight and oddly enough, it isn't a drunk story of my own.

I swear, my life is so fucking weird sometimes...Collapse )
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